My 24 Year Old Daughter Is Addicted to Meth & Zanabars, What do we do ??
My 24 year old daughter (Toni) is addicted to Meth & stays up 3 weeks at a time doing meth & then takes Zanabars to sleep!! She has 3 children, she lost her oldest 2 to her Mother (my ex-wife) after a drive-by shooting. She went to jail for 3 months, cleaned up & came out ready to take on the world.
Toni then went back to jail for 9 months for various offenses( DWI, Drugs, Hitting a Police Officer) & lost her 3rd child to the state after this episode. She came out of jail again, clean & ready to get on with her life. We got her a job & a Mobile Home close to her job.
She began the healing process of doing all the things you have to do to regain custody of your children & prove her sustained sobriety. She's done well for one year. She's been working & has finally gotten her 3rd child back (Maccie who's 3.
Her final hearing is schedualed for tommorrow morning November 15th 2011 & it's been said the Judge who has presided over her case likes her & believes she's done a good job. It's really a done deal, Toni obtaining full custody of Maccie. All is left is the formality of the Judges orders & the paperwork.
The bad news is ... Last night Toni almost OD'd on something. I, her father, hadn't seen her in about 3 weeks. I went to pick her up to bring her to the Bus Station to travel 4 hours away with her 3 year old daughter Maccie to go stay at her Mothers, who has custody of Toni's oldest 2 children.
Then they were going to Court together in the morning. But Toni couldn't function or hardly speak & her 3 year old was running around outside when I got there. I had to make a quick decision to either put her on the bus like this, & hope she'd make it ok & her Mother have her sleep it off ... or bring her to the Hospital & just keep my granddaughter (Maccie) with me.
After several hours of coffee & eating small amounts of food she became somewhat sober & I decided to go ahead & put her on the bus. She arrived a few hours later to her destination & her Mother has had nothing but HELL ever since.
The hearing is in the morning. What do we do??
Do we allow her to obtain custody & then we get a phone call that Maccie has been run over by a car because Toni is passed out on drugs - or does her mother step up & say "My daughter is in no condition to have custody of Maccie" & allow the State to take her back into States Custody, in which this time Adoption will surely be the case.
Maccie has been in States custody for over 2 years & only recently did Toni get Maccie back. I have qualified, My Mother, Maccie's Great-Grandmother has qualified, My Ex, Maccie's Grandmother ... all have qualified to take Maccie & have agreed to do so in the event Toni is denied custody.
But we're told that we have no guarentee this will take place. Others who are awaiting to adopt may come before we do, & we're family?? It's very confusing & very heartbreaking!! We're at a loss as to the right thing to do but we do know, we should have hired an attorney at the beginning of this mess but it's a little late for that now.
Your wife needs to speak up without question. The judge needs to know your daughter has relapsed, because imagine the danger Maccie will be under should your daughter start down the path of drug addiction again. If nothing is said and something happens to Maccie, how will you feel then?
Of all the days to relapse - the day before the custody hearing - shows your daughter isn't ready to resume responsibility for Maccie. She needs to detox, get sober and start over again to show she will be a responsible and worthy parent.
The main priority needs to be Maccie's well-being so that she's provided with a loving, harmoius and peaceful home. Why that isn't likely to be any of her direct family, who knows, but the State will no doubt want to make sure she's provided with the best care possible.
So someone needs to speak up and tell the truth. It will not only be the best for Maccie, but also your daughter, because if she isn't held accountable now, it's far more likely she'll end up down the destructive path of her addiction again.
All the Best
Click here to post comments
Return to Drug Alcohol Help Parents Q&A.