Enabling a 28 Year Old Son?
Our 28-year-old son is addicted to this stuff called spice. If not drinking or smoking pot, he'll use this stuff. He keeps losing jobs and now is homeless and shows up to our house to take care of him. I don't want him here! He needs rehab but I know he's not willing to go.
Should we just throw him out? We're tired of dealing with this problem(s) that have been going on since he was in Jr. High School. He is sick but is in denial! I know all about this because my mother and sister are recovered alcoholics! I dealt with them for too long and feel like it's dejavu with him. Sick and tired!
Sometimes as a parent you reach the point where you have to accept that there is nothing more you can do to help your child.
They've been given every opportunity to change and turn their life around, but all attempts have failed. What more can you do?
The harsh reality is that until your son is ready to admit his addiction and wants to turn his life around - no one can help him. It's the age old principle that he has to want to help himself before he'll ever get clean and change.
So as a parent you're going to have to learn to let go and let your son face up to the consequences of the choices he continues to make. And one of those is him having to learn to fend for himself and stand on his own two feet, without your help or support.
Tell your son you love him and only want the best for him - and that once he's serious to get professional help and go to rehab, you'll do what you can to support him. But until that point he's on his own and you can't have him living at home, making your lives a misery.
I know it's hard but your son needs to learn that he has to be held accountable for the choices he makes - and that you're not going to keep bailing him out when his life gets tough. Because that's enabling and is something you want to avoid.