Close Family Member Severe, Daily Alcoholic. Refuses to Admit Severity of Problem or Get Help.

He looks twenty years older than he is. He has been a long time alcoholic, but its now getting obvious in his appearance and daily drinking, that I wonder if his body will give out and he pass away before he *hits rock bottom*.

Our family held and intervention, and got him into rehab, but he left early and went right back to heavy drinking ... He now looks worse than he did before he went into rehab.

He also suffers from depression ... he obviously can't get or hold a job, lies continuously, and seems to be drinking up his last remaining savings, with an already overdue house payment, powerbill, car insurances, etc. ... and may even need a psychiatric evaluation for his mental state.

Have applied to get him into a 6 month, christian based treatment facility, but after he originally agreed to go, he now has went back on his word, once again, and now refuses to go.

His body can't take much more of this daily abuse, which is clearly showing in not only his depleted appearance, but his mental state, as well. Me and the rest of his family are bit desperate, to say the least.

Any help is appreciated. GOD bless.

Answer

The sad reality is that no matter what we do for them and the help we try and get them - some people will never recover from their alcoholism ... and so eventually it kills them.

Hopefully that doesn't become the case for your family member, but the key requirement to overcoming alcoholism or any addiction is the willingness to change. Right now he doesn't have that, so all you can do is keep trying to get him the help he needs, and then hope and pray that the willingness to change at some point kicks in for him.

Despite our best intentions - we can't control someone else and their behaviors - so if he chooses to continue drinking there is little you can do. You have to remember and understand that you didn't cause his alcoholism, you can't control it, nor can you cure it.

All you can do is keep persevering in trying to get him into a proper alcoholism addiction treatment program (your idea of a long-term program is a good one) and making sure you don't become enabler. He has to bear the full consequences of his drinking and if it means losing his house etc, then so be it.

Because hopefully that will lead to his willingness to change and receive help being triggered, but there are just no guarantees. You just have to hope that somehow that trigger in his mind goes off where he decides he's had enough of the chaos and destruction, but you just can't predict if and when it will happen.

Best of Luck and Take Care

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