Alcoholism Is a Disease: As An Alcoholic Your Body Responds Differently to Alcohol Compared to Others
I can, of course, only talk about my own experiences in this matter. I haven't consumed any alcohol now for 5 years and I think I am better for it.
I have never attended AA or any alcohol rehab centres or anything like that. For myself, I believe that alcohol messes up the processes of my mind in so far as when I drink it alters the way I think.
I perceive everyone around me as the enemy, except those who put another drink in my hand. Anyone who tries to reason with me and curb my drinking becomes the enemy. This includes people I know that really love me and care about me and only want the best for me.
I find for myself that alcohol takes away my ability to reason and make rational decisions. I think that it is a disease and that I do need to stay away from alcohol for the rest of my life.
I would liken the disease of alcoholism to anaphalaxsis. There is no problem until it enters your body, and when it does, your body responds in a way that is different to the way most other peoples responds. It's like a bad chemical reaction, only alcohol makes the individual behave like a lunatic.
I do not think that it is only when an alcoholic is drunk that this lunatic-like behaviour happens. I think it lasts long after the person is no longer drunk because that alteration in the way that an alcoholic thinks is even there in sobriety for a very considerable amount of time afterwards.
For me personally I think that it took me a few years to get back into the normal way of thinking. When I remember back to the time I was drinking, I remember in the way that I was thinking back then. It has only been with time, and a clear head on my shoulders that I am now able to review my thoughts and the events that occurred and see my part in what happened.
I was not the innocent victim in all of it that I thought I was. The personal cost to me from drinking has been immense. I am now lucky because I am in the position that I don't want to drink again. I would rather drink a glass of poison than a glass of alcohol.
I am also fortunate because I can be around people drinking and not feel in the least bit jealous. Diabetic people have to watch others eat chocolate and they cope.
I hope this helps someone somewhere. I hope if you are still drinking and you need to stop, you can recognise some of the things that I went through myself and see some common ground. The good news is that when you stop, it does eventually get easier, although it can take some time, and your life will improve.
Like I said, I never went to AA, but taking things one day at time makes life a lot easier in the beginning, even hour by hour if necessary. If you crave a drink, don't go in a pub. Make life as easy as you can to avoid alcohol. Now all I have to do is give up the cigarettes and I'm sorted!