How Do I Know if my Wife is an Alcoholic?

My wife drinks a full bottle of wine every night. If we go out she makes sure she brings some.

Our son is currently in the hospital, day 10 of 12, and we are spending alternate nights with him. She brings and consumes a full bottle of wine with her each night she is there. She will not talk about it, she says it tastes good.

It is one of the first things she does when she gets home from work every night. She comes to bed late, we have no sex life to speak of, she reeks of alcohol from her pores every night when she comes to bed and often the next morning.

Answer

How long has your wife been drinking this much? I think it's safe to assume that your wife drinking a bottle of wine a night has a serious problem.

Whether or not that has developed into full blown alcoholism yet depends on whether she has become dependent (physically or mentally) and has lost the ability to control her drinking (i.e. can stop after a glass or two), which sounds like she has.

There are a number of different articles in the alcoholism symptoms section I suggest you read that will provide you with a number of different signs you can try and identify in your wife.

Even if your wife is an alcoholic, the difficulty your face is the fact that she is likely to be in denial about the nature/extent of her problem. Denial is the biggest obstacle an addict or alcoholic faces to receiving proper help and treatment for their addiction.

To help you process and better deal with the situation you are faced, I recommend you find an Al Anon meeting in your area to attend. These meetings are for family members and loved ones of alcoholics, and so you'll be able to meet and learn from others going through what you are, which can be a massive help.

The biggest thing you need to remember however, is that an alcoholic is entirely responsible for their addiction ... and ultimately overcoming it. The sad reality is that there isn't usually a lot you can do to help - unless your wife decides she wants to be helped.

I really hope you manage to get through this and that everything works out for the best. Take Care.