My Boyfriend is an Addict. I Love Him - Don't Know How to Quit

by Gauri
(India)

My boyfriend has been taking some drugs before we met. I worried about this, but managed, always wondering that he will be okay thinking it will help if I stay.

But now since I have tried hard, tried everything, and haven't been able to help him I feel helpless and don't know what to do. He says he tries, but again gets messed up in a month or so.

Please advice me what to do ... I am terribly upset and tired ... is there any hope or shall I quit? Will my leaving adversely affect him???????

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Answer

Hi Gauri

If you've done everything you can then don't feel guilty about breaking up with your boyfriend to try and make a better life for yourself.

No one can make your boyfriend overcome his drug addiction. He has to truly want to change and turn his life around - but unfortunately for many addicts despite what they say - they just aren't ready to make that commitment to change.

Your boyfriend's well-being is not your responsibility. We are each solely responsible for our own happiness and the choices we make. So until your boyfriend is ready to take full responsibility for his life and doing whatever it takes to overcome his addiction, no one can help him.

We can try and influence the people we love to change, but unless they want to do it for themselves, nothing we say or do will make much of a difference. So don't be afraid to move on with your life, knowing that you've done what you can to help.

God Bless and Good Luck