My 20 Year Old Son's Addiction to Heroin is "Killing" me.

by Torn apart
(Bakersfield, CA)

I first learned of my son's addiction to heroin after he graduated from high school. He played football all four years and was very well liked.

I was shocked to learn when I kept finding burned foil and gutted out pens in his room, what they were used for. I had NO IDEA. The first time, we took him to 30 day rehab, I caught him getting high in his room.

After the 1st time in rehab, he then went to "sober living" and met with his "N.A" coach and then was asked to leave "sober living" for testing dirty for "pot".

Needless to say, after many attempts to help him, Heroin is still destroying our lives. I am so saddened to see this drug consume my only son. He truly only has me for support.

He has his drug buddies but all his other friends that he used to be close to - their families are no longer comfortable with him around because of the stealing and lying he has done to them.

At first, I was hurt by my family and his friends not accepting him, but now I warn them. My son lives at home with my husband and I, and we never know what to expect.

We lock up anything of value and very rarely leave our home alone because of our fear of being robbed by my son. My husband is my son's step/dad and i think he has also given up.

I'm exhausted, I don't sleep because again of my fear of the not knowing. His Dad has never been any help. All my energy goes to my son and is truly taken away from my daughter and husband.

I've had a strong faith for many years, but I have to admit I don't understand and have tons of questions. I don't think I can cry anymore, but I am not well. My son is constantly on my mind when he's not home and when he is home. Still praying for a miracle. Thank you for letting me vent.