I Believe My Spouse is an Alcoholic and He is in Denial - Want to Leave Him?

My spouse and I have been married for 7 years. We have 2 children. Throughout our marriage alcohol with him has been a continuous issue. Two DUIs and domestic violence once.

When he drinks he doesn't know when to stop. He doesn't drink every day and goes for periods without drinking sometimes a month sometimes three months.

The last episode was 6 months and he got his second DUI. After receiving his DUI he came and picked me up from worked and asked if I wanted to go for a drink. I said no and asked if he had been drinking. He told me that he had half a drink of which he thought was an energy drink. I am leaving him now. Am I being unreasonable?

Answer

No one can tell you what is right for your particular situation - because each of us is different, and so trusting your instincts and what you think will be best for you and your children in the long run is usually the way to go.

Having said that though, before leaving him you could as a final resort tell him that this is his last chance and that unless he gets proper help for his drinking by going through a proper alcohol addiction treatment program - and then ensures he maintains a life of sobriety by working some kind of recovery program, you will be leaving him.

There is no guarantee that will work of course, especially if his denial is strong, but is worth considering attempting before the more permanent step of leaving someone.

I think it's great that you're taking a stand and have had enough, because too many partners just let things drift and so end up enabling their spouses behaviour, but consider giving this a try if you haven't yet done so. If he gets you're serious it may give him the wake up call he needs.

Just a thought?

Best of Luck!