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How Do I Convince My Husband That Drinking and Driving With Kids Is Not Okay ?

by kim
(Goshen , IN, USA)

This is a habit his whole family (5 brothers total ) do on a regular basis. They think nothing of having 2, 4, 6, 8 beers and driving, alone or with their kids. Fourth of July weekend the hub wanted to go get a 6 pack before he took the kids swimming to drink while they were swimming.

When I tossed a fit he says " Yeah, like a 6 pack will get me so drunk I can't drive them home." There was also one day he let my 14 year drive him and my 10 and 5 year old when he (the hub) was staggering drunk. Then makes me the bad guy for being angry "See kids, I can't do anything right for her.."

Company vehicle, unlicensed 14 year old driving, drunk supervising! Ready to file for divorce over this, I'm so done. But then a judge will just give him visitation where I am not there to stop him ...

He doesn't drink daily and rarely gets "falling down" drunk but often drives what he calls "fine" and I call "no way should he be driving" He's had one DUI, years ago, never seems to get caught. He was " fine " that night too according to him but was over the .10 limit. I wouldn't ever drink one drink and drive a kid, I don't get it.

Alcoholism-and-Drug-Addiction-Help.com Answer



Hi Kim

What your husband is doing is beyond immature and irresponsible. It's bad enough drinking and driving, but to do so with children in the car is simply unforgivable.


You're simply going to have to play hard ball and make it clear to him that if he ever does so again - you'll call the police so that they catch him in the act and arrest him.

And then make it clear what potentially losing his licence would mean and how his employers would feel when they find out, not to mention what would happen if they ever discovered an unlicensed 14 year old was driving his company car.

When logic and reason doesn't work, and you'd think it wouldn't take much of that when it comes to driving under the influence, especially when the lives your own children are at stake - you have to do what you have to do so that your husband learns his lesson the hard way.

And if it means being arrested, put in jail and losing his license is what it takes, then so be it. It's not about being so drunk you can't drive as your husband puts it - it only takes a small quantity of alcohol to effect your ability to respond quickly enough to end up in an accident.

Here's a statistic for your husband - of all fatal road accidents, more than 50% involve alcohol. And you can bet that many of those would have said exactly what your husband has - 'I'm fine to drive.'

Do what you have to do to put a stop to this. There is no other option. Good Luck.

Comments for How Do I Convince My Husband That Drinking and Driving With Kids Is Not Okay ?

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Why is it worse to risk injury to kids?
by: electric_bonzai

"It's bad enough drinking and driving, but to do so with children in the car is simply unforgivable."

Are you implying that it is somehow worse to risk the lives of the children than it is to risk the lives of other people? And if so, why? Are they somehow more vulnerable to injury in a car accident caused by a drunk than are other people?

..
by: Kim

I agree drunk driving is always offensive, wrong and just plain stupid ! I have a problem with him driving drunk without the kids as well ! But he thinks if he hasn't drank enough to make him legally above the limit , it's totally okay . I disagree . But my number one job is protect my children, as their mother.

Relate
by: Anonymous

I can relate to your story almost word for word. I aldohave threatened to call police, just not so sure what to tell them when I call, not knowing exactly the location my hhusband would be.

Uhhhh??
by: Pennsylvania

Please remove the words "with kids" from your title and the implication that the fact that kids are involved for some reason makes this worse. It's NEVER a good idea to drive drunk FOR ANY REASON, kids or not! As a potential victim of people like this, I'm offended that only the kids seem to matter with this issue. In addition to the the legal ramifications one should also consider that if this clown injures or kills another party he could also be SUED! Can he afford to pay somebody elses medical bill and lost wages for the rest of his life?

Pennsylvania

Agreed !
by: Kim

That's exactly what I have done, told him If I catch him at it again, I will call the police myself .
I have also said the same that you are telling me " Even a drink or 2 could slow your reaction time and make a diffference between you being able to prevent an accident and save your kids, why would you risk it ??

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