His Other Love: How Heroin Stole My Husband
12 years we had been together. I knew Tom had some issues when I met him but by the time I found out the extent of his problems I was in too deep to walk out.
Tom was a heroin addict and for the first 4 years of our relationship I dealt with it, ignorneed it, accepted it. It really was a horrible time.
Then I got pregnant with our first child and I gave him the ultimatum - and to my complete surprise it worked. .. he went into treatment and followed an excellent recovery programme. 7 years and two more children and life was good.
Then I started to notice a change in Tom, becoming moody and secretive .... I really thought he was having an affair but a photograph on a camera (taken by my young child) told a different story... sure we had all aged but in the photo Tom looked gaunt and empty.
I challenged him - was it heroin? He of course denied it and I swore to him that if I found out it was I would take the children and leave. It only took 3 months for me to get the definitive answer ... she was back - good old Miss Heroin.
So I did as I promised - I left. No arguing, no confrontation, nothing. It broke my heart to leave but I couldnt take that life again - I couldnt put my children through it .... I loved Tom I just hated his addiction.
After that Tom barely managed to function - he was a complete full blown addict again. We kept minimal contact and all our dealings were revolved around the children. Life went on and even though he was still an addict he was able to lead a half functioning life eventually.
I really hoped he would get himself clean for his childrens sake. Late last year I got the call - Tom had been found dead with a needle in his arm.
She won, she got him in the end and left 3 beautiful children without a father. I felt so guilty - had my leaving him made his addiction worse .... that still haunts me sometimes.
I still mourn my lost life, my childrens lost lives and I do mourn Tom - I loved him til the day he died, but I just couldn't handle the addiction.