Caroline's Alcoholism Story: I'm Not Sure I Can Put Up With My Husband's Drinking Anymore

by Caroline
(Georgia)

My name is Caroline and have a wonderful husband and three beautiful children! Alcohol has detroyed my husband and all of our relationship.

I have been attending Al Anon for three years now and found a lot of peace - however I have come to resent my husband for everything he is about.

He is a third generation alcoholic and I was aware of this when we met. I grew up around people who drank but had no idea what a horrible destroying disease it could be.

He was smart, ambitious, and dazzling to be around. We married had a good self owned business. Had children and he would party but not majorly.

I was loving and possessive. Thought everything was great. Ten years into our marriage things got bad - business was not good ... lost everything.

I started working outside home making descent money. He gave up!!!Shucking all responsibility. We lived an expensive life!!!

Now we have been married 23 years. He has been in trouble with Law .Three Dui's, Jail, House arrest. Thinks the police have it in for him. Very paranoid.

On top of that he will not take care of himself...Chronic sinus,asthma,high blood pressure,depression. I have to make him take his meds.

He does nothing to help himself and I continue to save him and our marriage. Why?????? All I can think about is life without him. I feel guilty for dreaming about this.

I don't know what to do? I don't want to ruin my children's lives. They are now 21,19,and 16. They love their Dad. He goes to AA but continues to drink.

In the morning he is a nice guy but you never know who he is going to be in evening. I want to divorce him but don't have guts!!!